02 September 2015

Notes - work-a-day / raw passion / hopeful art

         1012 hours. I was reading a popular human relationship column in the Cincinnati Enquire this morning and the focus was on ‘self importance’. I immediately thought of my note to fellow classmates about Bill Miller. I had not thought of it as self-importance but now I do. Mary M., Fritz and Judy S. enjoyed my comments, so I am assuming they didn’t see it that way. Those weren’t my conscious thoughts as I wrote it; at least I don’t think so. Nothing I care to do about it now.

         Obviously the ‘self-important’ stickage is not something you want on your headstone. What you want on your headstone is “Mostly Fiction”. Why don’t we let it go. Talk to Kim about having that put on your headstone later – Mostly Fiction seems most apt. Drop the thoughts boy, not worth the mental debate. Post. –Amorella

         After noon local time. Carol is having a light lunch before the doctor’s visit. You are going to take a diet orange soda with you. You both did your exercises; yours were the usual forty minutes. – Amorella

         1237 hours. I love the concept of old Westerville, how it was during and just after the war up to 1950 after we moved to Minerva Park. It reminds me of the Grover’s Corners setting in Wilder’s Our Town. I was always acquainted with Otterbein Cemetery. I had fun playing all kinds of make up games on and around the cemetery grounds. I always knew the Dead were under my feet and I thought of them as friends who were watching over me like my parents and grandparents and neighbors did. As I grew older the cemetery became fuller and I noted the new stones more personally because I ‘knew’ those people and they ‘knew’ me. They were mostly relatives or neighbors or people in the ‘village’ of the old Westerville I knew. I was always comfortable in town and I’ll be comfortable buried in Otterbein. I worked at the other cemeteries also when with Blendon Township. Pioneer, at the south end of town, Blendon Township out on Dempsey Road, the old Methodist Cemetery at the near north end of Westerville, right next to some of the men’s college dorms. Dave Short and I cut the grass, trimmed and trimmed the bushes as well as made sure the cemeteries were cleaned up for visitors during those summers of our college years. I liked working for the Dead. I felt comfortable with it and took it as a personal obligation, a duty of respect for ‘all’ the Dead who had been people not just military veterans. (1253)

         Mid-afternoon. Carol passed her final physical knee replacement exam and you both decided to share a two scoop Graeter’s turtle sundae to celebrate. Tonight, a change of pace; you are going to the Brazenhead Irish Pub for supper. Later today or tomorrow you are taking the twin bed back to Kim’s old room. You reminded Carol of Linda’s (and your) suggestion buying new furniture for the TV room since you are not moving anytime soon (so far as you know). – Amorella

         1517 hours. I am so glad she ‘passed’ and of course so is she. Now things can get back to normal. The throw rugs in the hall can be put down as well as other throw rugs and the living room coffee table can be put in its normal place, not off to the side. The chairs and coffee table in the TV room can also be put in their normal places too. The place will look more normal when Craig and Alta arrive within a couple of weeks.

         You have more errands to do. Post. - Amorella


         You had a good supper and Carol is still excited about the doctor’s orders (so to speak) to do, as she will, but no marathons. As such, she is walking in Pine Hill Lakes Park for the first time in a very long time. She is trying twenty-minutes worth because the terrain is not flat but she is staying on the main paved path. You are parked in the shade up by the earthen dam with the windows down and facing east so not to startle the walkers or runners moving by on the path. – Amorella

         1846 hours. I think I might make some women apprehensive sitting facing the path as they come around the curve in the woods. I don’t wish to scare people unless its kids coming for candy at Halloween. We are going to miss it again this year but we’ll leave treats next door with Kings anyway. There aren’t nearly so many little ones. Shoot, as soon as I laughed or smiled the scary wall was gone and up they came for a treat or two. Earlier we drove up to Monroe to drop off a contract with Mid-Miami to repair our roof. The shingles we have a 25 to 30 year warranty so it is better to repair than put new ones on since our shingles are only about twelve years old.

         You watched a DVRed NBC News and last night’s “Rizzoli and Isles.” Carol just went up to read before bed and you are heading up to listen to some relaxing music first. Post. - Amorella

         2104 hours. Another day without any work on the chapter but I do not feel the necessity to work any faster. I have no motive other than to finish the books before I die, but if I die sooner that is the way life is sometimes. With the first three books I was bound and determined to come out with one book a year and I did. I reached my goal. These books are better written and better organized. They are not new though. The other day I read someplace that no one should write a second book, a sequel to the first, unless it has sold lots of copies and been highly recognized so that more money can be made. I am sure this is true. And, for a moment or so, I felt a bit of a fool from continuing on, but I felt it a necessity for myself. I was not going to feel comfortable until I had my say. These GMG books don’t have that sense of them to me. I learn more from them but it is fun learning, fun challenging. It is like I am five or six and really haven’t started school yet. Writing is interesting because I am Homo sapiens, I think that’s the simplest explanation. (2115)

         You were reading a new BBC article on the ‘history of punctuation’ and enjoyed it very much; so much so that you shared it on your Facebook page tonight. The point here is that upon reflection of the article – and the separation of the emotional from the intellectual – you have come to the realization that one of the great differences between the Merlyn’s Mind trilogy and the GMG trilogy (as by how they were and are being written) is that the Merlyn’s Mind trilogy is steeped in great passion, and at times, near madness. - Amorella

          It is truly a rough draft but one closest to how it was when I felt I was possessed to tell the truth of what it is to be myself coming out of the spiritual desert like an Ezekiel combined with William Blake and the character of Captain Ahab. The first trilogy was my white whale rising and there is nothing that could be done about it. I caught the whale in my head and strung it out in three books of letters to dry. Not wanting it to decay and rot I am now cataloging my great white whale and trying to do it justice through a better art of writing. I don’t know if I will succeed; but this is due to the respect I have for the ‘dulled (if not now dead passion for the original within). I feel relief in sharing this. (2204)

         Any insight is a form of self-education, orndorff. Your heart is expressing yourself above not your mind. The words are a part of who you are as a human being. Some would find such matters a torture or a hell; but you find it liberating. Post. - Amorella

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