14 December 2016

Notes - drafting 5 / ripples / drafting 6 / expo.novel?



      Late morning. You are at the Mason Community Center parking lot waiting for Carol to finish her laps. Jill is cleaning. Ann arrives at one-twenty-five then she and Carol will drive to see their friend, Morita who was hit by a car in Hyde Park and who is recuperating at her daughter's in Wyoming. - Amorella

       1110 hours. Much prettier winter day, the sun is mostly out (higher scattered and filtering stratus clouds); looks we got an inch at most. The Center doesn't have free Wi-Fi access anymore, too bad.

       Go to draft four, place on the left and a new document, draft five, on the right of the screen. - Amorella

1144 hours;

Definition Outline, draft 5

There is no clear scientific evidence or unique definition of what a soul and its metaphysical counterparts might be. Subjective evidence precludes there is human phenomena that relates to a soulmate, generally defined as: "a person ideally suited to another as a close friend or romantic partner". Soulmates exist. Ask a few people and they will tell you this is so. Some take the word figuratively and others literally -- it's subjective at best, but it is a phenomenon related to the act of 'being in love'. Soulmates are real because human beings are real, this is the point. To date we have no direct evidence of spirit particles or forces, but we have evidence of positive spiritual directions when a person is arctively in love with another person. People who have a conscious life have witnessed this either within themselves and/or within others. The objectivity is witnessed in human behavior because people can be, in part, objective. The subjectivity is witnessed when one is dealing with the realities of being human. One may disagree on definition but many an individual senses sheorhe has what passes as a heart and soul and mind, no matter what science may say about it. [grade level reading - 11]

***

       You are back from lunch at Potbelly's. The 'science' draft appears acceptable. - Amorella

       1322 hours. It has a reading level of 11th grade and a reading ease of 50 percent. Certainly it is a working level for a draft. I am assuming Soki is going to be addressing this.

          He is. Consistency of tone, manner, voice, etc. is most important. Soki is clear in speech and 11th grade is basically saying that most high school graduates could read this if they so wished. The reader expectation is no different than you had for any surviving your junior and senior classes. You consistently taught on the level you were taught in your college sophomore literature (Dr. John Coulter) and history classes (Dr. Harold Hancock) at Otterbein University in 1962-64. - Amorella

          1412 hours. I am very comfortable with your above comment. I too was consistent in tone all the years I taught. The Reading Ease of 50 percent -- Time magazine is 52 percent and Melville's Moby Dick is 57 percent. I am feeling better about the words falling where they may; at  draft is what it is.

          Jill left a few minutes ago and you are waiting for Joe or Jason to bring the oak  stair railing and put it up later today. - Amorella

          1431 hours. I will definitely feel safer from falling either up or down the steps having a sturdy railing on both sides to grab onto. Strange, you know what I remember most about Coulter and Hancock -- not their intelligence, though it was plenty evident -- it is their kindnesses to me personally and to their classes in general -- they were honest, polite and considerate and showed genuine respect for/to all on campus -- always. I never witnessed otherwise.


          Some ripples deeper down, boy. Quite a surprising personal revelation. Post. - Amorella


          1531 hours. Joe and Jason arrived about ten minutes ago and are in the process of installing hardware to the wall.

          Relax until they are done then we'll work on the 'philosophy' section. - Amorella

          Carol was home before Joe and Jason left. The railing looks really nice, once stained it will blend in well; it is better than what you expected because the ends had to be cornered to the wall to meet the new fire code (so a fire hose cannot become caught in an open-end railing). Carol and Ann saw Morita and Judy which is nice because they usually get together in December before Judy winters in Arizona. - Amorella

          1705 hours. Carol just fed the cats so I have time to work.

          Continue with the same documents. - Amorella

          1730 hours. I have the philosophy section completed. Here it is.

***

Consciousness appears to come from the mix of passions in the heart and cognitive, thinking and reflective mind of the individual, and in here, in this book, the non-material soul houses the non-material heartanmind. Consciousness is the essence of a person, this essence is incorporeal and eternal in this book; when a body dies the heartansoulanmind, the spiritual essence, moves on. The spiritual essence, the personal pronoun, the "I" of a person leaves the body, the passion and the reasoning process leave the body dead of personality and humanity. This spiritual cohesiveness is not abstraction of the mind. It is not imagination. It is witnessed when viewing a dead human body. To deny this is to deny one's own physical mortality. What was once a living being no longer is. The objective reality is that essence, the soul, the human spirit is no more. [grade level: 10/ease: 50]

***


          Post. - Amorella


          1819 hours. This is interesting. I am becoming absorbed in the style and tone. It reminds me more of an expository essay in tone and style. I loved teaching the expository essay and the beginning of such a class was my week of logic lecture. Here is an online definition.

** **
What is an expository essay?

The expository essay is a genre of essay that requires the student to investigate an idea, evaluate evidence, expound on the idea, and set forth an argument concerning that idea in a clear and concise manner. This can be accomplished through comparison and contrast, definition, example, the analysis of cause and effect, etc.

Please note: This genre is commonly assigned as a tool for classroom evaluation and is often found in various exam formats.

The structure of the expository essay is held together by the following.

  • A clear, concise, and defined thesis statement that occurs in the first paragraph of the essay.
  •  
It is essential that this thesis statement be appropriately narrowed to follow the guidelines set forth in the assignment. If the student does not master this portion of the essay, it will be quite difficult to compose an effective or persuasive essay.

  • Clear and logical transitions between the introduction, body, and conclusion.
  •  
Transitions are the mortar that holds the foundation of the essay together. Without logical progression of thought, the reader is unable to follow the essay’s argument, and the structure will collapse.

  • Body paragraphs that include evidential support.
  •  
Each paragraph should be limited to the exposition of one general idea. This will allow for clarity and direction throughout the essay. What is more, such conciseness creates an ease of readability for one’s audience. It is important to note that each paragraph in the body of the essay must have some logical connection to the thesis statement in the opening paragraph.

  • Evidential support (whether factual, logical, statistical, or anecdotal).
  •  
Often times, students are required to write expository essays with little or no preparation; therefore, such essays do not typically allow for a great deal of statistical or factual evidence.

  • A bit of creativity!
  •  
Though creativity and artfulness are not always associated with essay writing, it is an art form nonetheless. Try not to get stuck on the formulaic nature of expository writing at the expense of writing something interesting. Remember, though you may not be crafting the next great novel, you are attempting to leave a lasting impression on the people evaluating your essay.

  • A conclusion that does not simply restate the thesis, but readdresses it in light of the evidence provided.
  •  
It is at this point of the essay that students will inevitably begin to struggle. This is the portion of the essay that will leave the most immediate impression on the mind of the reader. Therefore, it must be effective and logical. Do not introduce any new information into the conclusion; rather, synthesize and come to a conclusion concerning the information presented in the body of the essay.

A complete argument

Perhaps it is helpful to think of an essay in terms of a conversation or debate with a classmate. If I were to discuss the cause of the Great Depression and its current effect on those who lived through the tumultuous time, there would be a beginning, middle, and end to the conversation. In fact, if I were to end the exposition in the middle of my second point, questions would arise concerning the current effects on those who lived through the Depression. Therefore, the expository essay must be complete, and logically so, leaving no doubt as to its intent or argument.

The five-paragraph Essay

A common method for writing an expository essay is the five-paragraph approach. This is, however, by no means the only formula for writing such essays. If it sounds straightforward, that is because it is; in fact, the method consists of:
1.   an introductory paragraph
2.   three evidentiary body paragraphs
3.   a conclusion

Selected and edited from -- owldotenglishdotpurdue.edu/owl/resource/685/02/

** **

          After the news, etc. let's further edit the above to fit with its use in a novel. - Amorella

          1911 hours. Shall we edit from what's here?

          No. - Amorella

          1932 hours. I have never considered writing an expository-like novel before. I am intrigued. Here is what I came up with. - rho

** **
             The expository-like novel is clear, concise, and has defined structure. It is composed of clear and logical transitions. Where plausible the setting, character, dialogue include plausible evidential support that appears be factual, logical, statistical and anecdotal. Creativity and artfulness are used to leave a lasting impression on the audience. It is helpful to think of this in terms of a conversation or debate. Therefore, the expository-like novel is to be complete, logically and it leaves no doubt as to its intent. A conclusion readdresses the thesis for further thought; synthesize and come to a conclusion concerning the information presented.

Selected and quite roughly edited from -- owldotenglishdotpurdue.edu/owl/resource/685/02/

** **

       You are correct. No help from me, none needed. Post. - Amorella

       Carol made scrambled eggs for supper and then you both watched NBC News and last night's new "NCIS". We have the 'religion' aspect of the definition. Let's get to it. - Amorella

          2057 hours. I'm good to go. So far this is fun.

          2114 hours. I completed the last paragraph. Here it is:

** **

          Some religiously oriented human spirits suggest that only human beings have immortal souls. Others say the human spirit is the essence of the real person. A Sanskrit word that corresponds closely with soul means the individual self. This soul, this consciousness, has no birth or death, and leaves the physical body upon mortal death. This soul can transmigrate from one body to another when circumstances permit. This is what some religiously oriented people say. [grade level: 8.1/ease: 59.2]

** **

          Put the three paragraphs together as a whole in a separate document titled draft 6 of the definition. - Amorella

          2126 hours. I did this. The paragraphs together are readable in a 9.9 grade level and a 52 percent ease.

          The focus is a definition of spiritual consciousness. - Amorella

          2135 hours. Is this a body of spiritual consciousness or a system?

          It is the essence of spiritual consciousness. - Amorella

          2138 hours. I keep thinking in the grander meaning -- a spiritual universe.

          Do you mean a greater or grander spiritual consciousness as, for instance, gravity or gravitational force? - Amorella

          2158 hours. Yes.

          You want to cover the bases before the ball park is built? - Amorella

          2200 hours. No.

          Carol called and you have been cleaning in the far corner reaches of the master bedroom for about an hour now. - Amorella

          2255 hours. Almost an hour. Busy time for things I do not like to do but nevertheless from time to time have to be done. She reminded me the bedroom will be painted next month so this was going to be done, no question about it. I found things I did not know we ever had in the first place; my stuff no less. We bury our humor in corners sometimes. I'm ready to call it a night.


          Post. - Amorella

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