Notes - epiphany./ The Dead 14 completed

         After you have had some thought about the central unspoken thesis you still have no words. - Amorella

         I don't know what to say.

         That was to be expected. This has been an epiphany for you. - Amorella

         I need to look this up to make sure this is the right word. I thought about epiphany but I am not sure it is the right word in my thinking. Words, thoughts, have dimensions, layers of dimensions, you know. The only definition that works is "a moment of sudden revelation or insight." I don't know what the difference is between revelation and insight. I have to check -- revelation: "a surprising and previously unknown fact". Okay, that works. insight -- "the capacity to gain an accurate and deep intuitive understanding of a person or thing." That works also. In these word contexts I have had an epiphany. I knew what the words meant but words are tricky and people sometimes say them or write them without thinking of the consequences.

         Really. Boy, sometimes you not only build a trap but then you walk right into it.  - Amorella

         It's the matter of dark humor built pretty deep into my character, Amorella.

         That's not going to be lost, I assure you. - Amorella

         I'm back to nothing left to say. (0917)

         You are going to have company in a bit. Carol is making an excellent lunch for the four of you. Enjoy. Once we complete Dead 14 we can go back and set up a couple more chapters for Aunt Patsy and Uncle Ernie, plus you want to give yourself time to burn them on CD's. Later, Dude. (ALL CAPS ARE GOOD.) Post. - Amorella

        Mid-afternoon. You had a good lunch, salad, spaghetti pie, a veggie mix and a long loafed Italian bread topped off with each ordering a dip of ice cream from Graeter's in Westchester. Carol and Craig had chocolate coconut almond chip and Alta and you had black cherry chocolate chip. Excellent flavors and you had a very good time. You will see them again when they pick you and Carol up at a hotel at the Austin, Texas airport. And, you have the beginnings of another trip planned for the late summer of 2014. You and Carol will be driving your new car (it should be broken in by that time) up the northern route to eventually hit Yellowstone, Grand Teton, and Glacier National Parks. Craig and Alta would fly to a city along route for the trip and on the way back you would drop them off at an airport of their choice to fly on to Tucson: a tentative plan. You talked about England/Europe but presently it is too expensive.

         1628 hours. I am thinking about the newly added direction. Will any of the chapters have to be changed? If so, how drastically? I would rather we just continue along and that the two definitions will take care of themselves -- we already have a variety of dimensions going on as is.

         Nothing changes. It is as you suspected, already planned in, you just weren't told about it. - Amorella

         This added concept gives me a sense of personal dignity in writing the Merlyn books  that I would not otherwise have.

         Take your nap. More later. We will move directly to Dead 14 and finish it up.  Post. - Amorella

         2216 hours. The Dead 14 is completed in 740 words. I had trouble with the conclusion and cut out about a 100 words that were really off point. I have one sentence where Merlyn is looking up as his hut is roofless at night. He says, "The stars are out." Then shortly he is asleep. I don't know if he means the stars are out, that he can see them or the stars are out, meaning there are no lights in his sky.

         Why not change this to: Innocently Merlyn glances up to see the stars are out. - Amorella

         Oh. That's interesting. What does innocence have to do with how the stars are? I like it.

         Make the change then post. - Amorella

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The Dead 14 ©2001-2013, rho draft

         Merlyn lay in his bed, in his hut within his predominantly private spiritual environs. He is unable to sleep, as many of the Dead, at peace. When a dignified otherworldly ghostly composition rests as a slab of earthly granite sheorhe is the best spiritual peace HeavenOrHellBothOrNeither have to offer. That's what Merlyn's fellow Dead say. Merlyn grumbles, "I am no more a princely pebble than the commonest of headstones this, my black night of our most natural rest." 

         This questioning place, seemingly in my head, is no place different than it was when I was alive. In my mind one definition of character is defining one's most troubling question and then focusing until a reasonable response is forthcoming, a response one can live or be dead with. Once in life a young druidess came to my lean-to shelter deep in the oak forest and said, "I am searching for wisdom while attempting to define love. I was told to seek you out, thus here I am."

         I remember smiling, mostly of surprise. I said, "What is your name child?" I said it as if I were asking my own grandchild (of which I had none), "What is your name child?"

         She quite clearly, as clear as a mountain stream, politely and melodiously replied, "Vivian. My name is Vivian."

         In a forest of hard wooded honesty I said, "Why did you repeat your name just now? Are you not sure who you are?" She was either underwhelmed or overwhelmed, I could not be sure. I stated directly to her clearly green-rimmed dark pupils enclosed in the fair blink of healthy white as Celtic lids and long as the night dark lashes as her teacher not as a grandfather. "You have to define yourself, Vivian, before you can define either wisdom or love."

         That was so long ago, thought Merlyn, but it is still fresh. Such a memory, and at the time, seemingly less innocent than now; but even innocence is not as it seems. What does that mean for a human being not to be innocent? Why was Mother Nature innocent? Why are the lesser animals than human beings innocent and we are considered not innocent? Planning. Attempting to maneuver the future for our own betterment, is that innocence? That's what the second and even the first Rebellion of the Dead was about. The Dead lost the first Rebellion and we won the second. Manipulation and Innocence cannot co-exist. Survival in life is not innocent; survival after life is. The Dead are always innocent. We continue to exist whether we want to our not. We make do. Even when we sleep like stone it is only a dream, a wishful thought of being solid like stone. What a strange thing, the only thing stone has is continuity. We have continuity and physically we are less than nothing.  476 words.

         A voice whispered from the corner of the roof down to the earth-like floor beneath his bed. "Hello, Merlyn. I can't sleep either. Do you want some company?"

         "Is this Brighid, daughter of The Dagda?" Once considered a Celtic goddess, he thought.

         "No, this is Brigit, who was once your love, Merlyn."

         "Before Vivian."

         "And after, Merlyn."

         Love does not go away among the Dead, remember Merlyn. Love does not run nor does it linger. Love is a moment never completely lost thus it has no right to recovery. Love is always surrounded by innocence.

         "I read your thoughts, Merlyn," whispered Brigit. They are always lined in kindness.

         "You could always read me. I think that is the reason we parted in life."

         "Only physically, Merlyn, and Here we are together."

         "How is this that we remain true to friends and lovers in this place?" He felt her right arm touching his back as he lay on his right side.

         "I am forming as are you."

         "Wishful thinking," grumbled Merlyn as if he were half asleep.

         "Just as in life, my love. People are married to wishful thinking."

         "In life people are married too many a thought for life," responded Merlyn and suddenly felt his patience growing and his back and her arm disappear into the night.

         He turned over, opened his eyes and saw the empty wall with no roof above. He blinked innocently to see the stars are out, and concluded, such is the lot of we who are Dead. And, in a moment Merlyn lie still, a sarcophagus, a human spirit entombed.

         743 words

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