Afternoon. Your morning appointment with Dr. D. went well enough. Your
expectations were met with a politely honest, "you are going to have to
live the lower spinal osteoarthritis as well as osteoarthritis in the right hip".
The right hip is a new specific but in reinforces the reason you have trouble
walking. She put you on physical therapy for the next ninety days with a
possible MRI after. The only pain relief she could supply is gabapentin (Neurontin),
the very drug you are quite allergic to, the only drug you have an immediate adverse
reaction to -- disorientation, a deep dizziness, and seizure-like effects. Obviously, she
would not order it for you under any circumstances. You had a late home built
lunch consisting of ham and swizz, mustard on a flat bread, half an apple, some
potato chips and a Coke Zero. You both watched last night's "NCIS.LA"
and "Madam Secretary" this rainy afternoon. - Amorella
1806 hours. I find it odd that Neurontin puts me almost immediately into
a mental shutdown when it is supposed to help with seizures among other things.
I remember the almost immediate odd dizziness from deep within rising up into
consciousness and then a broad disorientation and collapsing into a deep sleep;
all this within three or four minutes. Very strange sensations. I was at the
physical therapist's when I took it for the first time. I was sitting, then I
don't know what. I was on the floor and people were taking care of me. They
knew what I had taken. I woke ups within a half hour and was declared okay. I have avoided the drug ever since. (1815)
Tomorrow morning, a appointment with Dr. B. You may go to Kim and Paul's for Halloween 'trick or treat' tomorrow night. Post. - Amorella
No real supper tonight. You both watched "NBC News" and then
MSNBC for a half hour or so. You rash is bothering so you cleaned and dried it
and put baby power on to help. The ghost story you chose for tonight was a
moral challenge at the time because I suggested David and Bathsheba for the
theme. - Amorella
1949 hours. I feel uncomfortable (to a point) because I use G-D. Originally
in the Merlyn stories if G-D is used I spelled it G---D with three hyphens, one
Jewish, one Christian and one Islamic. I also felt the necessity to capitalize
the D as a respective form.
This is quite arrogant for a spiritual
person such as yourself. - Amorella
1953 hours. Way back when I thought you, the Amorella, were are
representation (of sorts) of an Angel of G-D. (I was quite confused on the
subject because I said to myself, 'An Angel of G-D would not say 'hello' to the
likes of me.' And, you replied, "You are arrogant." That's how I remember
it (this incident is focused on several times in this multi-year blog). No
matter because I learned something about being spiritual through those what I
thought were out and out spiritual experiences. To use a Biblical story as the
setting of a fiction seemed to me to be blasphemous. I thought it might be an
angelic test. Finally I came to the conclusion 'I am writing David and
Bathsheba in a modern druidic-like fiction and that in itself would show the
intent is fiction'. I am/was not attempting to re-write the Bible as my
wonderful teacher, Dr. John Coulter once suggested to me while I was a student
at Otterbein. I think my arrogance, my honesty and my naiveté surprised him. I
miss him still. Here is Grandma's Story about David and Bathsheba. (I no doubt
was overly sensitive when I felt I was dealing with Amorella as a real
angel. Using this as a Halloween story
is a first. Perhaps I should take a step back from within the 'base' of
heartansoulanmind. (2011)
You will not step back though because it is
an honest story you would tell directly to an Angel if asked to do so. -
Amorella
2012 hours. Indeed, I would. This is another private spiritual lesson I
have learned.
***
Grandma’s Story 4h17
Again, we return to long ago, three
thousand years or so before the present, to a King and Queen in the Middle
East. One
summer day King David stood on the roof of his palace and he noticed a woman
with dark hair and dark features in a bath on a roof over what would be almost
a city block away. Beauty is not the word he would have used. Perfection
immediately came to mind and elsewhere too. How is this, he wondered, that
perfection is so close to me when my perfection has now departed to G-D.
Perhaps this perfection is a gift from, A, my late wife’s love. Or, perhaps she
is a gift from G-D, he thought. I am king in his name, or I should be. I have
done good works. I am of the loins of Abraham and Sarah. I am as Abraham still
living. Perhaps she is a gift.
He quickly found who the woman was.
Bathsheba, wife of his good and loyal general, Uriah the Hittite, who loved
soldiering and war more than anything else in the world. I have to touch this
woman, thought David, she is heaven sent for a king no question about it.
David felt justified as king that G-D
would give him a present. It seemed the natural thing for G-D to do, to help
him through his recent personal sorrows. When she arrived as ordered, David
touched her and surprisingly, Bathsheba touched him back. She was not perfect.
Perfection would elude even a king, that he was sure of. His intuition about
the woman below on a neighboring roof was quickly set straight in his mind and
elsewhere too.
Lust rushed in and stuck in his mind as
an enemy spear. David became instantly terror struck. Lust for a present from
G-D. I am stronger than that, he thought, and he sat and confessed to this
woman he had never met before what had almost overcome him.
Bathsheba sat with him surprised at his
unpretentious manner and understood how it felt to have lost a love as she once
had years before. She held him in her arms as he cried like a child. He
dismissed her at her own bidding so he might have some privacy and she too.
This feeling of attachment was new to both of them. Neither had been ready or
prepared for the moment.
When they met again, this time is secret, they
made love in a passion that neither expected. They were bathed in a mist of
passion so fine that both could see the same rainbow in their heart of hearts.
The unexpected happened as did the expected.
A few weeks later she called on David and he
responded immediately. “I am pregnant with your child, David,” she said. “I
will be stoned to death for adultery.”
“Have you not slept with your husband?” he
questioned.
“No. He is busy soldiering and will not be
bothered.”
“I will not have you stoned, with or without my
child,” said King David without thinking. “I will come up with something.”
It was then that Bathsheba realized she was in
love with the king. He would not let her die even if the child was not his or
her husband’s child. “I love you,” she said abruptly and without forethought.
“I love you, too,” he responded. Again, he
thought, this woman commanded the situation. She will make a good queen. How can this be? She is my general’s
wife. I have many wives, but he has only one. I cannot take her from him, and I
will not. It was then that he thought on how Bathsheba could still be G-D’s
gift to him. Only if the general dies a good death in battle will I wed her. If
he does not, I shall allow her compensation and protect her from stoning. I
will cross that bridge when I come to it. I will think of something.
Very soon, almost too soon, there was a battle
afoot and brave Uriah, the general was up front with his men as always. A good
and loyal general through his last battle. Thus it came to be that Bathsheba
married King David. Their son died young. Nathan the Prophet, told the king his
son’s death was partial payment for the king’s adultery, but David asked, “if
this is so, why did G-D take my son and not myself?”
“For further punishment,” hailed Nathan the
righteous and the wise.
“How do you know this?” commanded King David,
“That G-D should speak to you before he would speak to me in private.”
This was a loaded question and Nathan quickly
reassessed the situation. “I do not know, my king,’ he responded somberly.
“We shall have another child,” snapped David
the King.
And, with that Nathan was bruised and
dismissed.
It was then David realized the depth of his
love for Bathsheba. He realized that G---D may have been talking to him through
Nathan because he was a powerful prophet, but David did not know that G-D was
not also talking to him the king. And, in point of fact, neither did
Nathan.
Much later, Bathsheba asked a much older David,
“Will our son be king?”
“Yes,” he responded with no hesitation. “I
shall do as you wish, Solomon will become king while I am still alive to see
it.”
Bathsheba smiled, but knew she had no need to
thank David for what his heart had told him to do. From her point of view, from
that time long before when she told the king she was pregnant, she had come to
realize a truth about love. Love, like true beauty, works from the inside out
not the outside in. She was content with the king’s response that Solomon would
be king. David was content that she was content.
Solomon saw this joint contentment in his
parents and said to himself, ‘true wisdom, like true love, must come from the
heart first and the soul must concur. The absence of one from the other will
lead but to a shadow of wisdom and not wisdom itself.’
That’s Grandma’s story. I had to do some
telling in this one because that is how people have heard it. Grandma smiled
knowingly and winked in delight.”
When Grandma’s story is
done there’s a wake that will follow,
In the river of deep
thoughts and its shallow;
The great bend in the
river between the slave and the free,
With a marked
separation where you may want to be.
A guilt for being born
human causes much strife,
And the free human
unshackles this slave in their life
By accepting what one
is, a piece of humankind --
Filled with imperfect
sails for the strong winds in the mind.
Words flow free as
small letters by Merlyn's own hand
Across a crammed
flowing fiction carrying earth, floaters and sand.
©
The Merlyn's Mind trilogy by orndorff
***
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