02 January 2018

Notes - a hard time / boys on the playground




         After noon. This morning you drove to Otterbein Retirement Village off St. Rt. 741 near Lebanon to see where the funeral will be for Vic Feinhaur, Ann's husband. Ann was one of Carol's fellow teachers at the old Blue Ash Elementary School in Blue Ash. Tomorrow, One of Carol's other retired Blue Ash teacher friends, Marita, will  join you for the drive up.  On the way home you discovered the Honda was using too much fuel so you stopped and had the air in the tires checked. All four tires were down. You figure you were getting about twelve miles to the gallon for these first forty-six miles since the fill up. Normally, you get about twenty in this extremely cold weather pattern. - Amorella

         1311 hours. My watch says it's ten degrees presently.

         Later, dude. - Amorella

         You had lunch at Longhorn with Jenn as your long time waitress. You are feeling extra good about it because while Carol left a seven dollar tip you secretly got away with adding another three just because you haven't seen her in a while and she is special. When she brought the take home box for Carol she chatted for a bit then as she left she gave you a touch on the right forearm as a 'thank you'. - Amorella

         1535 hours. I was afraid she might say something, but then I remembered I had to stuff the other three in the folder. No doubt she realized what I had done and didn't say anything out of the ordinary. I realize three dollars extra was uncalled for from Carol's perspective but heck, it is New Year's time. We will both miss her when we move. She has our choices down pat and delivers our drinks when she takes our order. Plus, she is always cheery with a real smile. Once I saw her at Chipotle and she said 'hi' and gave me a quick friendly hug. We like her and we will miss her. We always try to go to Longhorn's when she will be working. If she had been in my class she is one of those boys or girls that I secretly adopted as family in my heart. (1548)

         You are home. How many do you remember secretly adopting? - Amorella

         1647 hours. I have a terrible time remembering individual names but in 37years, probably one every three years, maybe two. Usually girls because they were more interested in literature, that is whoever these people were they had a passion for literature and reading, some also for writing. I'd say one every three years plus five more at the end; that would be 17 or 18 students. A few were C students but most were A or B. They had poetic or philosophical hearts, that's because they are the individuals I related most to. As to family almost all I would have adopted as nieces or nephews. I had two or three girls and two boys that I would have adopted as sons and daughters. Most were not going to become English majors or even minors in college though a few did. Some did become school teachers or academics. Shoot, one, but not on the list for obvious reasons, is my real daughter. That's how I grade my heartanmind on such things. (1701)

         Why didn't you include your soul when it should be included in choice-making? Amorella

         1703 hours. Probably because I think it is morally wrong to think about adopting a student and I am somewhat embarrassed and ashamed to admit I cared so deeply about one student or another. Keeping them as nephew or niece in my heart was being protective in the secret relationship I held for such a very few, but to deny it with an Angel present would be wrong. When I write about students on Facebook I always say, "I love literature and loved my students". I had the best possible job I could have in this world. I have been a very lucky individual to have worked and not taken a dime if I could have afforded to." (1711) -- All this is rather embarrassing and actually private, if you will. It is between me and me.

         Speaking of Angels did I ever tell you what he thought of your little theatre production in philosophical humanity? - Amorella

         1715 hours. No. I wasn't thinking about 'him' consciously anyway. There wasn't much there to 'review' as it were. Each had her say, her part. I can't remember what was said now, but the important thing was that heartansoulanmind agreed the soul was created and immortal before Nature existed. I agreed with them which sounds about par for the course. What did he think?

         He thought you or your parts would not have changed a word if even an Angel of G-D was in attendance. - Amorella

         1724 hours. I would hope this even if G-D, as such, did not exist. It is that important to me.

         Indeed. So secret this is, and impassioned. And, yet you fail to note this in consciousness. - Amorella

         1727 hours. I really have a hard time even comprehending what you say, Amorella. And, I think it is just as well.

         Post. - Amorella


         You watched the news and another full episode of "The Crown". You have both been watching parts of Rachael Maddow and Lawrence O’Donnell until now. Post. - Amorella

         2253 hours. The 'news' about Trump's tweet on how his red button is bigger than Kim's red button is on about the boys will be boys level of six to ten year olds. Why Trump is allowed to remain President is beyond the two of us. We would have both been better off not listening to Rachael and Lawrence tonight.

         Life overtook you both. Post. - Amorella

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